Less than helpful

What do you do when someone you love is having a hard time, but they live really far away? I want to help them, but I don't know how. I listen, I give advice, but in the end I feel less than helpful. Partly because they are in situations that I can't really do anything about and partly because I am so far away. I can't give them a hug.  I can't hand them a tissue if they are crying. I can't just be there, be present, be more than a voice on a phone, or an email, or a text. Even in our hyper connected world, being half a world away is still really far away.

It's moments like this when I realize that maybe I am not capable of being as "independent" as I let on. I'm needy and I get lonely, I'm nowhere as confident as people seem to think I am, and I doubt many things about life, mainly my life. As I write this, I realize how incredibly selfish I sound. This isn't supposed to be about me at all, but about the people in my life who are going through things that I wish they didn't have to go through. I'm frustrated by my inability to help them, but the truth is I don't know that would be that helpful even if I was there. There are moments when life throws you a curve ball and all you can do is duck, but maybe having someone else to duck beside you would at least make you feel better? Or maybe it's just me, it would make me feel better and so I assume that others feel the same way.

So I guess I just want to put it out there. I want the people that I love to know, I'm with you even when I'm not physically there. You are in my thoughts, my prayers, and my dreams. I carry you with me because you are a part of me. I wish so badly that I could make it better for you. I wish that knew what to say to make it all go away. I wish that you weren't hurting, confused, and upset. I am here for you, even if it just over the phone. Anytime, day or night. You matter to me, even if I don't tell you how much as often as I should. I share your triumphs and failures. I will help carry your load if I can (and you let me), and if I can't I will do what I can to remind you of how strong you are. I know that sometimes life doesn't quite turn out the way we want and it certainly doesn't turn out the way we plan, but if you need me I am there for you, even when I'm not.